yin and yang

i used to think of myself as a very moralistic teenager with all my principles laid out and i set off to save the world

but i didn’t manage to save anybody and here i am hangin on a life’s thread. the world is so gray, nothing is black, nothing is white, there’s not even shades. it’s just a piece of gray that seems to change colors in front of your eyes.

is killing right? the textbook says no but what if you were doing it to protect yourself?

is being loving all that nice? no, not if that person does not want to be loved

the world did not used to seem sooo efed up

so what is it? is it better to have a life with no dirty smudges at all. at the end, regretting that you never had a chance to do sth wrong

or is it better to cover yourself in smudges and finally washing a small bit to find a clean spot and say why didn’t i do this earlier.

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