we are made up not ourselves, but of our environment.
we are shaped by our bonds that we make with friends, relatives, even dogs.
on that trip so south africa, i developed a bond with my van buddies, to an extent where i thought i was courting them
and now, i am back where i am, i suddenly seem to loose the motivation to keep these bonds.
they talk to me, but at that moment in time, i dismissed it without a thought
now, that they seem to have realized. i’m suddenly woah. what happened to the bond we once shared
in a sense, i feel guilty of my actions but on the other hand, i realize that i am only human
and humans do change. we change because our bonds change
it’s quite weird. i’m sure you’ve had tough situations. and it’s weird how tough situations actually are more conducive to bonds.
the worse situation you are, the more you depend on your friend for support, and wala, bonds develop
humans are social creatures, we blend into our surroundings, we make our friends and fit in. it’s our instinct to do so, to fit in
so when we do change environments, let’s say change schools, over a period of time, we do fit in
this is the reason why long distance relationship don’t work. this is why different schools don’t work for couples
some do work, but then it forces me to wonder if they are only making the fitting in process all this more painful
humans gain and learn through their interaction with the environment, with their friends
a confession i have to make is about this
last year, i was in so much pain after she left. i felt like the world had ended but i had no one to talk to.
i felt that no one could understand my pain except a few because my pain was so great
i only aquanited or socialized with people i thought who would understand me
but this year, maybe the pain has been relieved or that i have realized my theory was bullshit, i have become friendly with almost everyone
maybe i’ve realized the fact that i am not so great after all, i was clouded by my oh-so-bad situation. but i think no matter who we are, where we are, we always change, change according to our situation, to our bonds
so i think meng zi was right. 近朱者赤，近墨者黑