no doubt about it
this blog was meant for me to piece out my thoughts, one by one, and when i look back, i get a clearer understandin about the world
but tonight, i’ll admit that i’m lost
i’m lost in my own abyss of sins, lost in the haven of God’s arms that i am unworthy of , lost in the rush of everyday life, lost in the tsunami of knowledge, lost in the amount of tasks, lost in my own mercurial emotions,
lost in the things of things……
i’ve tried many things.
trying to get a new gf – check
trying to get my old gf back – check
trying to get no girflfriend – check
trying to watch stupid comedies to clear my mind – check
trying to read and watch profound things so i get inspired – check
trying to just lie there and think – check
trying to listen to music – check
trying to trust in the lord (i’ll have to admit i haven’t tried my best)
the list goes on and on. the more i try to filter out and organize my thuts, the more muddled up they become
i just feel like my future is so uncertain, like how fickle, vulnerable it is.
i’m wondering about my calling, my destiny
i know this is the age where i question myself, form my own identity
but where is that spark of inspiration, simple sentence that changes the world, person that reaches my soul and the soul that reaches out from it’s hollow feeling space.