sober

You get to see a lot when fresh high school graduates who’ve never partied before have access to open bars.

puke, crazy dancing. but there’s a third thing that’s much more exciting and horrifying when we see it: the true nature of someone.

the milder revelation is that of the nerd who dominates the dance floor after consuming his 16th shot.
the more surprising one is that of the boys who grind tipsy girls, getting them to lie on their shoulders and putting an arm around their waist; that of the girls who have boyfriends unashamedly lean on guys they like and refuse to let go even when told to go home. i find this morally unacceptable.

in normal life, most of us put on facades for other people to see. jerks being nice guys, sluts being proper girls. in most cases, the facade can be maintained even in the most difficult of circumstances, in the most sleep-deprived situation because we are still mentally conscious.

that being said, alcohol should be proclaimed as the most amazing truth serum. by turning off our mental consciousness but keeping the consumer physically awake, we get to see the unmasked, true side of a person.

i typed stuff on my phone while waiting to take Wilfred home (i only had two shots over 4 hours, so i was fully conscious). here it is but edited:

“friends become hookup targets when they’re drunk. then, lies have to be made to hide the truth. lies accumulate and couples break up. couples only work as long as those concessions to keep the relationship intact are made. possible forever? hardly ever. it takes a lot of sacrifice from both sides and it’s not even fail proof. all it takes is a little luck to be involved in an incident that fucks it all up, like touching another girl when you were drunk. you can blame this for the world we live in because we have to live with the consequences of our actions, whether we are awake or drunk.”

m&n broke up. they were the golden couple in my mind. kc&al might break up too despite going through so much to be together.  i realize i’m a person very influenced by my surroundings. my emotions, especially my perception towards love depend heavily on the perceptions towards it of those around me.

at this moment, i do hope that this can stretch on till forever, until we’re 90. i just can’t stop dreading that thought that something small will screw it all up. BUT..

..when it comes, it comes right? there’s no stopping it. we can only try, our very bests.

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