Maslow has a hierarchy of needs. i have a hierarchy of needs too.
first: desire for completion of academic and extracurricular responsibilities.
for me at least, school comes before all else. if work is due the next day, everything else is less important.
second: desire for cleanliness.
even if i’m dead tired and it’s 3am, i always take a shower before i go to bed. the thought of going to bed without being clean horrifies me. and to some degree, this applies to the state of my room too. if my room is too gross, i will take time to just move things until it’s acceptable.
third: desire for rest
when all my work is done and my room is at an acceptable level of cleanliness, i usually just rest. because at this point, nothing really threatens my well being as a person.
four: desire for reflection and intellectual stimulation.
the point which i’m at now, enough energy to continue this post and think somewhat critically. and then i get bored and start thinking which usually persists until i exhaust myself. i realize that i never at any point in my life am content with who i am, mentally, intellectually, physically. i’m always trying to better myself (which in retrospect is not always the case.)
i always have some lofty idealization of myself that i want to bring to life, which i think i have the time for. (reaching the fourth need usually means i have way too much free time.) and it kind of works out while i dream about it. and then it never pans out.
did i tell you i’m also very extremely gullible. i listen to everyone’s opinion. i also swallow the message in every article/blog post/essay that’s longer than three hundred words and try to incorporate into my decision making, not realizing that a) i usually forget in about three seconds flat.
but i got my dose of intellectual stimulation today so i again have some lofty idealization of me that i want to see come to realization.
this it the big ideas issue and to connect all the pieces together i have to list them in a specific order.
this article is about how our society is slowly rejecting big ideas. we are now more and more focused on tidbits of information, little facts about other people’s and our own lives.
i always wanted to believe that i liked big books. books about history of man, history of the world explained through big theories. but then when i read this article, it all suddenly seemed to be like some sort of scam. the quote unquote bestseller was the one that had the biggest loftiest ideas that went along well with everything that was being discussed currently.
and that’s the big ideas issue.
to be honest, (complete serious face), i want to go through some big change and not just read cool articles, think about them a bit, and keep living my old life. i want to change some. i can’t even take that seriously anymore because that’s exactly what i mean by lofty idealization of myself.